In December, when I was in India, Siddharth took me to the room and told me

"Acha, Genevakku Povam" (Dad, let us go to Geneva).

I told him "Ninte schoolu poottumbol pokam" (we will go when your school is off).

I then asked him "what do you want to do in Geneva"

"I want to see snow on the hills" he said

"I want to go to the swimming pool" he said

"I want to go to yummy M (our code for McDonalds" he said

"I want to go to the Park" he said

It was clear that he remember all that, which was a relief. It was also clear that he misses all these, which was painful realisation.

Siddharth left Geneva, abruptly. He was to come back after holidays. His school fee for second semester was paid. Instead, I got an e.mail saying his mom will not come back, meaning he will not come back too.

I was in two minds, "Shall I fight it out now ?", or "Shall I give him a chance to settle down with some peace and quiet without being put in a pressure cooker where there is always tension in the air day in and day out"

In the end I decided that let Siddharth stay back in India and I will give him some time to settle. It was only after 8 months that I went to see him. I cried every day of those eight months.

Siddharth was a changed boy when I met him again. He was attending school and had grown in size. I went again in December and he was even doing better at school, though I noticed that he is actually speaking less.

It was in that December that he told me that he want to come to Geneva. It was then that I promised to bring him here.

I had planned it all here. I had taken leave for the entire month of April. I was to travel to India on 27th March when his school was closing. I dreamt of the day when he will come back from his last day of school and his daddy will be there to meet him.

Did Siddharth dream of that too ?. I dont actually know if Siddharth dreams because he dont tell me. But I am sure he had dreams too.

It is those dreams which are shattered. Now of course he did not tell me that his dreams are shattered. He just did not tell me anything.

It is amazing what a child can communicate by not communicating.

Every afternoon, at 5 PM sharp, I will call Siddharth. Either his grandfather or grandmother will take the call. They will call Siddharth.

"Hello", I will tell him

"heLLO" he will shout back

"sukham aano"  I will ask him

"yes" he will tell me

I will then ask him a series of questions about school, snacks, Ammu chechi, rain and cycle. Mostly he will give me a monosyllable, often prompted.

However, on 1st of April, he stopped taking my calls.

May be he was expecting that I will be there on 31st March and we will come to Geneva.

In spite of everything which was going on with Jaya, I still wrote to her towards the end of March that I am interested to have Siddharth with me and it will be nice if they could both come. I got no response.

Ten days later, I wrote again suggesting that if they dont want to come to Geneva, let us go to any other part of the world. I got no response again.

I was informed that such mails are not appreciated.

However, I will try again. Even if Siddharth"s parents cannot agree to join together for his sake, to give him at least a week of holiday, one flight to somewhere, one visit to a swimming pool, one meal at a McDonald, he still deserve it.

Both his parents can easily afford both. But at the time of writing this, there is no settlement on the issue.  Siddharth will have no holidays.

He will feel cheated and is likely to withdraw further into his dreamworld.

God, is this what he deserve ?